BS

"Bob Schmall"

28/02/2004 7:25 PM

OT-humor

The other morning I took a pair of underwear out of the drawer.

"What the hell?" I said to myself as a little "dust" cloud
appeared when I shook them out.

"April," I hollered into the bathroom, "why did you put talcum
powder in my underwear?"

She shot back: "It's not talcum powder. It's 'Miracle Grow'

--
Bob Schmall
Not one shred of evidence exists that life is serious.
Richard Feynman


This topic has 30 replies

cC

[email protected] (Charlie Self)

in reply to "Bob Schmall" on 28/02/2004 7:25 PM

29/02/2004 11:21 AM

Bob Schmall writes:

>
>The other morning I took a pair of underwear out of the drawer.
>
>"What the hell?" I said to myself as a little "dust" cloud
>appeared when I shook them out.
>
>"April," I hollered into the bathroom, "why did you put talcum
>powder in my underwear?"
>
>She shot back: "It's not talcum powder. It's 'Miracle Grow'

You're not in trouble until a can of spray starch rolls out of the skivvies.

Charlie Self
I don't approve of political jokes. I've seen too many of them get elected.

http://hometown.aol.com/charliediy/myhomepage/business.html

jJ

in reply to [email protected] (Charlie Self) on 29/02/2004 11:21 AM

29/02/2004 12:16 PM

Just curious Bob, why do you need a pair?

BS

"Bob Schmall"

in reply to [email protected] (Charlie Self) on 29/02/2004 11:21 AM

29/02/2004 10:36 PM


"John" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Just curious Bob, why do you need a pair?

I presume that's a rhetorical question? If not, I really don't want to know
you.

Bob

sD

[email protected] (Doug Miller)

in reply to [email protected] (Charlie Self) on 29/02/2004 11:21 AM

29/02/2004 10:49 PM

In article <[email protected]>, "Bob Schmall" <[email protected]> wrote:
>
>"John" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>news:[email protected]...
>> Just curious Bob, why do you need a pair?
>
>I presume that's a rhetorical question? If not, I really don't want to know
>you.
>
This is just one example illustrating exactly _why_ my TrollFilter drops
_every_ post that originated at webtv, except for JOAT's. :-)

--
Regards,
Doug Miller (alphageek-at-milmac-dot-com)

For a copy of my TrollFilter for NewsProxy/Nfilter,
send email to autoresponder at filterinfo-at-milmac-dot-com

jJ

in reply to [email protected] (Doug Miller) on 29/02/2004 10:49 PM

29/02/2004 7:59 PM

Dougie baby, is your superiority a gene thing, or did you develop it
yourself?

jJ

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

01/03/2004 10:56 AM

Hell, Bob, I'm just trying to figure out what is a "pair of underwear".
Your words, not mine.

BS

"Bob Schmall"

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

01/03/2004 12:08 PM


"Edwin Pawlowski" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "John" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>
> > Hell, Bob, I'm just trying to figure out what is a "pair of underwear".
> > Your words, not mine.
>
> Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
> Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant,
thus
> making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
> Ed

As usual, Pawlowski gets to the heart of it. Metaphorically speaking...

Bob

Nn

Nova

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

01/03/2004 4:27 PM

Edwin Pawlowski wrote:

> Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
> Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant, thus
> making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
> Ed

Then what do you get when you buy a pair of pants, four legs?

--
Jack Novak
Buffalo, NY - USA
(Remove "SPAM" from email address to reply)

Gs

"George"

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

02/03/2004 6:48 AM

If five, it's a glove....

"Robert Bonomi" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> In article <[email protected]>,
> Nova <[email protected]> wrote:
> >Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
> >
> >> Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a
pair.
> >> Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant,
thus
> >> making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
> >> Ed
> >
> >Then what do you get when you buy a pair of pants, four legs?
>
> Nah. if it's got 4 legs, its a *TABLE*.

bR

[email protected] (Robert Bonomi)

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

02/03/2004 8:24 AM

In article <[email protected]>,
Nova <[email protected]> wrote:
>Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
>
>> Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
>> Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant, thus
>> making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
>> Ed
>
>Then what do you get when you buy a pair of pants, four legs?

Nah. if it's got 4 legs, its a *TABLE*.

VR

Victor Radin

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

01/03/2004 10:00 PM

In article <[email protected]>, [email protected]
says...
>
> "John" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>
> > Hell, Bob, I'm just trying to figure out what is a "pair of underwear".
> > Your words, not mine.
>
> Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
> Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant, thus
> making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
> Ed

If that's the case, wouldn't Bra be plural rather than singular?

EP

"Edwin Pawlowski"

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

01/03/2004 5:35 PM


"John" <[email protected]> wrote in message

> Hell, Bob, I'm just trying to figure out what is a "pair of underwear".
> Your words, not mine.

Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant, thus
making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
Ed

BS

"Bob Schmall"

in reply to "Edwin Pawlowski" on 01/03/2004 5:35 PM

01/03/2004 8:57 PM


"Charlie Self" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Ed Pawlowskis asks:
> >> Hell, Bob, I'm just trying to figure out what is a "pair of underwear".
> >> Your words, not mine.
> >
> >Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
> >Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant,
thus
> >making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
>
> Don't know, but I can hear all over again my drill instructor screaming at
a
> boot who had said his pants were pressed: "Sailors wear pants. Women wear
> pants. Marines wear trousers!"
>
> Wonder if that's another one of the little fun discoveries still in
existence
> at Parris Island.

Aahhh, the Marines. The few, the proud, the hairless.

cC

[email protected] (Charlie Self)

in reply to "Bob Schmall" on 01/03/2004 8:57 PM

01/03/2004 10:24 PM

Bob Schmall responds:

>> >Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
>> >Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant,
>thus
>> >making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
>>
>> Don't know, but I can hear all over again my drill instructor screaming at
>a
>> boot who had said his pants were pressed: "Sailors wear pants. Women wear
>> pants. Marines wear trousers!"
>>
>> Wonder if that's another one of the little fun discoveries still in
>existence
>> at Parris Island.
>
>Aahhh, the Marines. The few, the proud, the hairless.
>

Ah, yes. I see these kids today, and every one of them has white sidewalls. One
of the bennies of "graduating" from PI was the chance to actually grow a little
hair back. I spent most of my 4 years getting hollered at for having hair too
long, even though it got cut weekly, and wasn't long enough to reach my
forehead. I got to college and one of the first things (took awhile though) I
did was let it grow to almost shoulder length. Once that was done, I walked
into the nearest Marine Corps League group and checked on joining. Heh. I
stayed away from other Marines for something like 30 years after that
experience. Joyful bunch of toddlers.

Charlie Self
In a New Hampshire Jewelry store: "Ears pierced while you wait."

http://hometown.aol.com/charliediy/myhomepage/business.html

cC

[email protected] (Charlie Self)

in reply to "Edwin Pawlowski" on 01/03/2004 5:35 PM

01/03/2004 7:21 PM

Ed Pawlowskis asks:
>> Hell, Bob, I'm just trying to figure out what is a "pair of underwear".
>> Your words, not mine.
>
>Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
>Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant, thus
>making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.

Don't know, but I can hear all over again my drill instructor screaming at a
boot who had said his pants were pressed: "Sailors wear pants. Women wear
pants. Marines wear trousers!"

Wonder if that's another one of the little fun discoveries still in existence
at Parris Island.

Charlie Self
In a New Hampshire Jewelry store: "Ears pierced while you wait."

http://hometown.aol.com/charliediy/myhomepage/business.html

MJ

"Mark Jerde"

in reply to "Edwin Pawlowski" on 01/03/2004 5:35 PM

02/03/2004 1:17 AM

Bob Schmall wrote:

>> Wonder if that's another one of the little fun discoveries still in
>> existence at Parris Island.
>
> Aahhh, the Marines. The few, the proud, the hairless.

Just a few good men. As for the rest of them, ... ;-)

-- Mark

jj

jo4hn

in reply to "Edwin Pawlowski" on 01/03/2004 5:35 PM

02/03/2004 3:47 AM

Bob Schmall wrote:
[snip]>
> Aahhh, the Marines. The few, the proud, the hairless.
>
>
Query: What is the sound that emanates from a handfull of shit thrown
into a fan??
Answer: Maaaaarrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnneee!!

Gone into hiding...

JG

"Jerry Gilreath"

in reply to "Edwin Pawlowski" on 01/03/2004 5:35 PM

01/03/2004 7:35 PM

So, was he comparing us to wimmen??? Hmmmm <G>

--
"Cartoons don't have any deep meaning.
They're just stupid drawings that give you a cheap laugh."
Homer Simpson
Jerry© The Phoneman®
"Charlie Self" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Ed Pawlowskis asks:
> >> Hell, Bob, I'm just trying to figure out what is a "pair of underwear".
> >> Your words, not mine.
> >
> >Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
> >Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant,
thus
> >making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
>
> Don't know, but I can hear all over again my drill instructor screaming at
a
> boot who had said his pants were pressed: "Sailors wear pants. Women wear
> pants. Marines wear trousers!"
>
> Wonder if that's another one of the little fun discoveries still in
existence
> at Parris Island.
>
> Charlie Self
> In a New Hampshire Jewelry store: "Ears pierced while you wait."
>
> http://hometown.aol.com/charliediy/myhomepage/business.html

pP

[email protected] (Phil Crow)

in reply to "Edwin Pawlowski" on 01/03/2004 5:35 PM

01/03/2004 5:09 PM

[email protected] (Charlie Self) wrote in message news:<[email protected]>...
Snip

> Don't know, but I can hear all over again my drill instructor screaming at a
> boot who had said his pants were pressed: "Sailors wear pants. Women wear
> pants. Marines wear trousers!"
>
> Wonder if that's another one of the little fun discoveries still in existence
> at Parris Island.
>
> Charlie Self
> In a New Hampshire Jewelry store: "Ears pierced while you wait."
>
> http://hometown.aol.com/charliediy/myhomepage/business.html

I still have trouble explaining to people what a cammie blouse is.

That's the overshirt of the camouflage utility uniform, for the uninitiated. <g>

-Phil Crow

CC

Cape Cod Bob

in reply to "Edwin Pawlowski" on 01/03/2004 5:35 PM

01/03/2004 8:39 PM

On Mon, 01 Mar 2004 20:57:33 GMT, "Bob Schmall" <[email protected]>
wrote:

>Aahhh, the Marines. The few, the proud, the hairless.
>
Theover-tetesteroned.

Cape Cod Bob
Visit my web site at http://home.comcast.net/~bobmethelis

TT

"TexasFireGuy"

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

02/03/2004 4:10 PM


"Edwin Pawlowski" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "John" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>
> > Hell, Bob, I'm just trying to figure out what is a "pair of underwear".
> > Your words, not mine.
>
> Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
> Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant,
thus
> making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
> Ed
>
>

I was told several years ago by my Great Grandmother that pants, shorts, and
underpants are called "pairs" because a long time ago they actually came in
2 pieces and you buttoned the leg sections, or halves, together. I have no
idea if this is true because I never looked it up, but it satisfied the
curiosity of a little boy at the time.

nn

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

02/03/2004 1:00 PM

Two outside & two inside?

On Mon, 01 Mar 2004 16:27:57 -0500, Nova <[email protected]>
wrote:

>Edwin Pawlowski wrote:
>
>> Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a pair.
>> Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant, thus
>> making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
>> Ed
>
>Then what do you get when you buy a pair of pants, four legs?

BS

"Bob Schmall"

in reply to [email protected] (John) on 29/02/2004 7:59 PM

01/03/2004 4:09 PM


"Victor Radin" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> In article <[email protected]>, [email protected]
> says...
> >
> > "John" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> >
> > > Hell, Bob, I'm just trying to figure out what is a "pair of
underwear".
> > > Your words, not mine.
> >
> > Interesting question. Just why is a boxer or jockey short called a
pair.
> > Or why are pants not a pant? Is the covering of one leg called a pant,
thus
> > making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
> > Ed
>
> If that's the case, wouldn't Bra be plural rather than singular?

Welcome to the English language, where there is an explanation for every
usage and a reason for none.

MJ

Mark & Juanita

in reply to "Bob Schmall" on 01/03/2004 4:09 PM

02/03/2004 4:00 AM

In article <[email protected]>,
[email protected] says...
> Bob Schmall responds:
>
> >> > making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
> >> > Ed
> >>
> >> If that's the case, wouldn't Bra be plural rather than singular?
> >
> >Welcome to the English language, where there is an explanation for every
> >usage and a reason for none.
>
> And twice as many words as the next closest language. That's what makes it fun.
>

... but at least English language nouns don't each have a gender, the
proper selection of which has no logical basis.

cC

[email protected] (Charlie Self)

in reply to Mark & Juanita on 02/03/2004 4:00 AM

02/03/2004 11:11 AM

Mark & Juanita notes:

>> >Welcome to the English language, where there is an explanation for every
>> >usage and a reason for none.
>>
>> And twice as many words as the next closest language. That's what makes it
>fun.
>>
>
> ... but at least English language nouns don't each have a gender, the
>proper selection of which has no logical basis.

True. And I've always wondered, but been really afraid to ask, just how
feminists do in those countries.

We lost the universal "he" and "his" to "their". What have the French et al
lost?

Charlie Self
In a New Hampshire Jewelry store: "Ears pierced while you wait."

http://hometown.aol.com/charliediy/myhomepage/business.html

cC

[email protected] (Charlie Self)

in reply to "Bob Schmall" on 01/03/2004 4:09 PM

01/03/2004 10:20 PM

Bob Schmall responds:

>> > making two legs worth a pair or the plural pants.
>> > Ed
>>
>> If that's the case, wouldn't Bra be plural rather than singular?
>
>Welcome to the English language, where there is an explanation for every
>usage and a reason for none.

And twice as many words as the next closest language. That's what makes it fun.

Charlie Self
In a New Hampshire Jewelry store: "Ears pierced while you wait."

http://hometown.aol.com/charliediy/myhomepage/business.html

li

"larry in cinci"

in reply to "Bob Schmall" on 28/02/2004 7:25 PM

28/02/2004 11:06 PM

Don't do that!!!! It's late here and I almost choked to death from inhaling
instead of drinking my bedtime hot toddy for the laughing. Be advised that
my untimely death would be on your concience (if you have one) forever. If
you do that again I will instruct my ghost to take up residence in your
tablesaw and do terrible things to it. 8>}}. Larry
"Bob Schmall" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> The other morning I took a pair of underwear out of the drawer.
>
> "What the hell?" I said to myself as a little "dust" cloud
> appeared when I shook them out.
>
> "April," I hollered into the bathroom, "why did you put talcum
> powder in my underwear?"
>
> She shot back: "It's not talcum powder. It's 'Miracle Grow'
>
> --
> Bob Schmall
> Not one shred of evidence exists that life is serious.
> Richard Feynman
>
>

BS

"Bob Schmall"

in reply to "Bob Schmall" on 28/02/2004 7:25 PM

29/02/2004 2:53 PM


"larry in cinci" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Don't do that!!!! It's late here and I almost choked to death from
inhaling
> instead of drinking my bedtime hot toddy for the laughing. Be advised that
> my untimely death would be on your concience (if you have one) forever. If
> you do that again I will instruct my ghost to take up residence in your
> tablesaw and do terrible things to it. 8>}}. Larry

Couldn't be any worse than the current operator.


LJ

Larry Jaques

in reply to "Bob Schmall" on 28/02/2004 7:25 PM

01/03/2004 6:09 AM

On Sun, 29 Feb 2004 03:56:58 GMT, jo4hn <[email protected]> brought
forth from the murky depths:

>Bob Schmall wrote:
>
>> The other morning I took a pair of underwear out of the drawer.
>>
>> "What the hell?" I said to myself as a little "dust" cloud
>> appeared when I shook them out.
>>
>> "April," I hollered into the bathroom, "why did you put talcum
>> powder in my underwear?"
>>
>> She shot back: "It's not talcum powder. It's 'Miracle Grow'
>
>Adds new meaning to the phrase "self deprecating". :-)

It also explains Mark whassisname's SIL's vine, doesn't it?


.-.
Better Living Through Denial
---
http://www.diversify.com Wondrous Website Design

jj

jo4hn

in reply to "Bob Schmall" on 28/02/2004 7:25 PM

29/02/2004 3:56 AM

Bob Schmall wrote:

> The other morning I took a pair of underwear out of the drawer.
>
> "What the hell?" I said to myself as a little "dust" cloud
> appeared when I shook them out.
>
> "April," I hollered into the bathroom, "why did you put talcum
> powder in my underwear?"
>
> She shot back: "It's not talcum powder. It's 'Miracle Grow'

Adds new meaning to the phrase "self deprecating". :-)
mahalo,
jo4hn


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